• fubarx
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    Home Alone.

    “Hey, sorry Kevin. Come on, hop in the car.

    • esc27
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      I think the movie actually did a reasonable job of explaining it. Multiple different households were traveling together, the whole thing was chaotic, a neighbors kid dropped by and was included in the head count, Kevin was on the attic and so out of sight, they were running late, etc.

  • tallricefarmer
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    Air bud. “You guys are insane. Listen. Your team will forfeit every game that dog takes the court.

    • BruceTwarzen
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      It’s crazy how this became a movie trope. It doesn’t say in the rules that a giraffe can’t be in the swim team.

  • EvilBit
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    28 Weeks Later.

    After the opening sequence sets it up and the story proper begins, it only progresses due to repeated, profound stupidity.

    “Let’s just run around outside of quarantine during a zombie apocalypse!

    “My wife has been out in Zombieworld for ages and has turned up seemingly unaffected and is being kept under strict quarantine protocols - I should make out with her!

    • RedactedEnglish
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      Seems pretty realistic to me if Covid is anything to go by

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        Ugh. You’re annoyingly right.

      • Tar_Alcaran
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        It’s completely normal behaviour, it just turns out that normal people are fucking morons.

        • callouscomicOPEnglish
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          Crap, you’re right. My original question is some fantasy that people aren’t idiots.

        • Marin_Rider
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          if I recall correctly, one of Melbourne’s major outbreaks was because one of the quarantine security guards was fucking a quarantined patient

      • EvilBit
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        surely you have kissably fresh breath

  • callouscomicOPEnglish
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    As a bonus, I remember watching Walker Texas Ranger with my father in law, amd the amount of times people had their sights on him and didn’t shoot him was ridiculous. He’d have died so fast.

    • Owl
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      He would have reflected the bullets with his abs

      • Spaceinv8er
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        Nah, the bullets would’ve just given up halfway through flight

  • Nytefyre
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    Every dragged out rom-com.

    “We have a bad misunderstanding about why our relationship sucks!

    “Well, let’s sit down and talk it over, okay?

    “Okay”

    End.

    • elfpie
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      Normal people talk things over? I would seriously believe that to be the farfetched scenario.

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      I would watch this movie with so much popcorn.

      • Mycatiskai
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        So you would have a handful of popcorn and the movie would be over.

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    The Host

    „Dump all the formaldehyde down the drain.

    „No that would pollute the water!

    „Oh ok let’s not do that.

    The End.

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    Alien.

    “Waow what the f-!
    - DON’T KILL IT!
    *kills it* - Sorry, you were saying?

    Still can’t figure why they didn’t kill it when they had opportunity. 😬

    • Broken
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      I was thinking more along the lines of:

      We were woken up to check out this signal.

      Shine that, let’s go home and get paid.

      But you know, we’re required by law to do so or we forfeit our payment.

      OK, so what’s the story we all say?

      Yeah, nothing there. Must have been a glitch.

      OK, let’s go home.

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        To bad both mother and the android were sent to look for the aliens in the first place. The crews main misson was a cover-up

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    John Wick, I mean who the fuck brakes in to a dudes house and shoots his dog.

      • Match!!English
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        that would make for an amazing john wick film

  • GarbageShootAlt2
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    Fight Club and the countless movies like it, which are character-driven and the character is driven by extremely maladjusted desires and behaviors.

    “Alright, but isn’t that being ableist in Fight Club’s case?

    No, if both of the alters acted like normal people, you’d just have an especially weird buddy comedy with none of the conflict of the original movie.

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      2020 proved that one entirely plausible

  • tetris11
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    Donnie Darko

    oh the weird bunny man who is the dead boyfriend of your sister told you to come out of bed and onto the street?

    Nah, bad dream, just stay in bed. Jet engine goes boom, Donnie’s buried under, only one other family in another timeline loses a jet engine, story over in 5 minutes

    unless the story then fixates on the other timeline where a jet engine just vanished off a plane and no one knows where, ah goddamit

  • wellDuuhEnglish
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    Pffft got a pen?

    Series:

    Sons of anarchy

    Heroes

    13 reasons why

    Terra nova

    The 100

    Mr. & Mrs Smith

    -> pretty much almost every series I’ve watched

    Movies:

    All transformers

    Almost all FFurious

    Definitely all jack sparrows

    Even the orig Mr. & Mrs Smith

    -> the more I think, the more the list grows

    Movies are all about those few moments that throw characters off the “right way, spinning up bunch of placebos with consequences and how characters emerge through all those stronger.

    • CmdrShepard42
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      Jesus, I thought this was the other post, “Whats your favorite movie of all time? and I was judging the shit out of you for this list.

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      I don’t get most of this list. If they only talked to megatron nothing would’ve happend. These street racers in fast and furious seem like smart level headed people, why do they talk instead of racing cars?

    • ouRKaoS
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      House on haunted Hill & Cabin in the woods bouth seem kinda plausible