• Flying Squid
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    Eh. I have plenty of pictures of my daughter naked as a baby. The weird part of this is showing off the naked picture to a stranger on the bus and making mention of the genitals in specific.

    Anyway, everyone knows that naked baby pictures are used to torture children in front of their serious romantic partners brought home for the first time. This has not happened in my 14-year-old daughter’s life yet, but I hope to one day have this privilege that comes with parenting.

    • OneWomanCreamTeam
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      My response, when my mom showed my first partner naked baby pictures was to nudge my partner and say "don’t worry, I’ll send you some more recent ones.

      My mom super didn’t appreciate the joke, but she never pulled out baby pictures for future partners.

      • ameliaDeutsch
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        This is hilarious. Good comeback.

    • shalafiEnglish
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      LOL, mom busted out the baby pics for every gf. My. Turn.

      • Entropywins
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        Gonna show your new step dad all the naked pics of your mom you have?

    • MonkderDritte
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      Torture? Why people have such trouble with their romantic interest seeing pictures of you naked when you looked totally different?

      • Flying Squid
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        It’s not actual torture. It’s just embarrassing your kid over something that most people would consider trivial as a form of ribbing them.

          • Flying Squid
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            You’d sure think so from some of these responses.

            But I do enjoy the person who thinks you need to get consent from a baby to ethically take its picture.

            • Ilovethebomb
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              We’re talking about in the nuddy here, in which case you really should have a good case for taking that photo.

              • Flying Squid
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                The good case is that the child was just born and didn’t come out clothed. Something many of you don’t seem to understand.

              • Flying Squid
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                So many of you think babies come out clothed.

                You also have this absolutely ludicrous idea in your heads that having a naked photo of your baby is child pornography. And yet none of you have an example of a parent facing legal repercussions for it. And somehow that doesn’t clue you in that it is, in fact, not child pornography.

                And then there’s the Finnish guy who is telling you all what prudes you are. One of the few sane takes.

                • ji17br
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                  Seems like these people are sexualizing babies and then making you seem like the crazy one. It’s kind of insane.

                • Cringe2793
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                  Thanks, please carry on telling me what kind of ideas I have. Forgive me for thinking babies have some rights.

                  No one said it’s child porn. It’s just that when parents show off your naked baby pictures it gets uncomfortable for everyone, as many here have expressed.

                  • Flying Squid
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                    No one said it’s child porn.

                    Multiple people have said it’s child porn.

                • Ilovethebomb
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                  Naked photos of children is pretty much the definition of CP, yes.

                  A parent is unlikely to face prosecution unless they share the photos, but that doesn’t mean it’s legal.

            • x4740N
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              Removed by mod

              • Flying Squid
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                If it’s child porn, you show me one single parent who has gotten in trouble for just taking a picture of their baby when it’s naked and showing that picture to their adult child’s partner.

                One single parent.

        • x4740N
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          Wrong, it is a form of mental torture and a violation of your privacy and consent

          • Flying Squid
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            I keep asking for evidence that anyone, anywhere has had lasting mental health damage from this and congratulations, you’re the latest to just assume it happens without evidence.

            • x4740N
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              You’ve shown in your replies to numerous comments that you are ignoring the personal accounts of others sharing their experiences they don’t like it and for some reason want peer reviewed sources

              If you where to compile the data of these responses into data that would form the basis of a paper

              Why is it so important to defend this for you that you ignore anything that doesn’t conform to your own biases and views on it flying squid

              Your wanting of peer reviewed evidence or psychological evidence seems to stem from the ignorance of anything that doesn’t conform to your views and biases on this

              And your responses to people ignoring their accounts of not liking it comes of as rude, distasteful and ignorant

              • Flying Squid
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                What personal account? I have not seen a single personal account. Please link to one.

                All I have seen is people who have claimed it would traumatize them if it happened to them, which they cannot know.

            • Ilovethebomb
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              Are you really asking for impartial evidence of basic human decency?

    • MindTravellerEnglish
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      Oh ew that’s some borderline pedo shit. “Here’s the person you’re fucking as a baby. Hahaha you’re sexually attracted to a baby. I created child pornography just to make you uncomfortable because you’re a normal, non-pedophilic person”

      • Flying Squid
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        Sorry, you think taking a photo of a baby when they’re born is done with the express purpose of doing something decades later?

    • Ilovethebomb
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      That second paragraph is pretty creepy actually, I think you’ve missed the point of the comic.

      • Flying Squid
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        I’d say it’s okay to show someone your child’s genitalia when they’ve already seen it anyway.

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          Yep, my wife has seen my little baby wiener. The awkward teenage pictures were far more embarrassing though. Hers are buried in a hoarder house so I might never get to see her embarrassing school band photos.

          • Ilovethebomb
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            I wouldn’t want to see naked photos of a significant other as a minor, but maybe that’s just me.

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              Normal people don’t view children as sexual beings, so their junk just isn’t any different than their foot. Parents especially. I see my daughter’s vagina several times a day, frequently covered in poop. It doesn’t register any differently than any other part of her that needs cleaning.

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                You’re still weird if you make a point of showing photos of it to someone though.

            • x4740N
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              It’s everyone who isn’t a weirdo

              This thread is giving me the ick

              • Ilovethebomb
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                Yeah, definitely. At best they’re arguing tooth and nail for embarrassing their child in front of their partner, if not outright CP.

                Major ick.

          • Flying Squid
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            Right? All you’re doing is saying, “when I saw it last, it was a lot smaller than when you saw it.

        • Ilovethebomb
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          Seeing someone naked as an adult isn’t the same thing as seeing them naked as a minor.

          You do see that, right?

          • Flying Squid
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            Dude, this has been a traditional way for parents to embarrass their adult children in front of their partner for decades. My wife has seen my naked baby pictures without my parents even showing them to her. And I’ve seen hers. What’s the big deal? It’s not like either of us found them sexy.

            • Ilovethebomb
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              Chopping part of your child’s dick off has also been traditional for decades, that’s a very poor justification for that behaviour.

              • Flying Squid
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                Are you really comparing showing your child’s long-term partner their naked baby pictures with circumcision?

                • Ilovethebomb
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                  My point is “we’ve always done it like that” isn’t really a justification.

                • Rekorse
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                  They are challenging the logic, is this really a confusing idea to you?

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                  They are challenging the logic, is this really a confusing idea to you?

            • KillingTimeItselfEnglish
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              it’s still weird (source, i have parents), at least ask your daughter for consent first.

              I’d consider it to be a breach of my privacy otherwise.

              • Flying Squid
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                They’re baby pictures. We’re not talking about something erotic here. Naked babies are not some sort of scandalous thing. In most cultures, they’re normal.

                • KillingTimeItselfEnglish
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                  i didn’t take them and i didn’t consent to them existing either. Neither did i consent to them being shown to anybody.

                  Naked humans are also normal, yet we still wear clothes. babies included, weirdly enough.

                  At what point does “naked baby photos” turn to “naked children photos” is my question.

                  how about this. You can have your naked baby photos, you just also have to be in the photo and naked as well.

                  • Flying Squid
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                    i didn’t take them and i didn’t consent to them existing either. Neither did i consent to them being shown to anybody.

                    Based on that reasoning, I should not show anyone any photo of my child until they were old enough to consent to them being taken.

                    You can have your naked baby photos, you just also have to be in the photo and naked as well.

                    I’m not embarrassed by my body and if that’s what her partner really wants to see, I don’t care.

                • Ilovethebomb
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                  Taking photos of naked children isn’t, and shouldn’t, be normal in any culture I’m familiar with, and you definitely shouldn’t be showing them to anyone.

                  • Flying Squid
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                    Well you should get familiar with Finnish culture and then start berating the Finnish guy who chimed in and said it was totally normal.

                    You know what an immoral, shithole country Finland is though.

                • x4740N
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                  DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT CONSENT IS

                  YOU LEARN IT AT SCHOOL, ITS VERY IMPORTANT

            • ArcaneSlime
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              Tbf child marriage is also traditional, Muhammed had a 9yo bride (it’s “ok, he didn’t have sex with her until she was 11.)

              Defending things based solely on tradition can get pretty weird sometimes.

              • Flying Squid
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                That’s a tradition that ended a long time ago. I’m talking about traditions that are ongoing. Also traditions that, despite someone else’s claim, probably don’t cause any psychological harm, at least most of the time.

                • ArcaneSlime
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                  I think you may be surprised and hopefully disturbed by this UNICEF article.

                  Despite a steady decline in this harmful practice over the past decade, child marriage remains widespread, with approximately one in five girls married in childhood across the globe. Today, multiple crises – including conflict, climate shocks and the ongoing fallout from COVID-19 – are threatening to reverse progress towards eliminating this human rights violation. The United Nations Sustainable Development Goals call for global action to end child marriage by 2030.

                  So no, it was not “a long time ago. It’s “hopefully by 2030.

                  Also traditions that, despite someone else’s claim, probably don’t cause any psychological harm, at least most of the time.

                  Oh, so as long as you don’t believe the person and can therefore invalidate their feelings without guilt, and it only psychologically hurts “some” people who you I suppose arbitrarily believe over the ones you don’t, it’s fine?

                  Not sure I can agree with you on this one.

                  • Flying Squid
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                    Believe what person? Hurts some people?

                    I have asked for evidence that it hurts anyone and have not received it.

            • Rekorse
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              You do understand that to cultures where this isnt the norm, it sounds ridiculous to show naked pictures of your child when they were an infant to, well anyone?

              It being a tradition has no bearing on it being awful or not. Circumcision is a tradition.

              I’m sure you can find a more modern way to embarrass your child without resorting to CP?

              • Flying Squid
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                Which cultures? And why do they get to decide what is right and what is wrong?

                Also, naked photos of children are not child porn. Do you think they come out of the womb with clothes on?

                I had to clean shit out of my daughter’s vagina regularly when I changed her diapers. Was that, similarly, sexual assault?

                • Rekorse
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                  I personally have no use for pictures of baby genitals, but you really do huh? It even makes you upset we want to take away your baby genital pictures huh?

                  Is this some perverse form of individualism?

                  Edit: if you took a picture of you cleaning your daughters vagina out, and showed someone, yes that would be child porn and child abuse.

                  • Flying Squid
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                    Again- they don’t come out of the womb with clothes on. Are parents not supposed to take a picture of their newly-born child or should they put a fig leaf on them?

                    I’ve asked several times- if this is child pornography, find me an example of someone getting in legal trouble for having a naked photo of their own baby on their phone. One person.

            • x4740N
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              Today I learned flying squid is okay with this kind of thing and that’s fucked up

              It’s a violation of privacy & consent

                • Ilovethebomb
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                  You can’t, that’s why you don’t take photos of them naked.

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                    My goodness are you obsessed with things I said hours or days ago.

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          NO IT IS NOT

          Always get the consent of the now adult that was in the picture as a child or don’t take the picture if they are still a child

          • Flying Squid
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            Dude, do you think I would intentionally cause my child actual pain? My god.

      • Classy
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        It’s all fucking weird. I never took photos of my child naked. I don’t get the idea at all.

    • x4740N
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      Downvoted because taking pictures of your child is still weird even though you don’t show them to anyone

      • Flying Squid
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        Sorry taking pictures of a child is weird?

        Do you think cameras steal the soul or something?