I think you can do all of the things you said without being overly formal about everything! For reference I have ADHD too. ☺️
God I hate forced formality like this. This is the kind of shit Gen Z and millennials are rebelling against and I’m all for it. It is stupid for us to encourage people to be themselves and then to expect them to act like a completely different person at work, including the way they talk.
Where is this OP?