• DirigibleProtein
    6122 days ago
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    I thought I couldn’t remember how to throw a boomerang, but then it came back to me.

    • intensely_human
      722 days ago
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      They say it’s all in the wrist.

      Yeah. They say they’ve never seen anything like it. That’s what I said. Freak accident. Yeah. The entire thing.

      He’s going into surgery so they can try and extract it. Yup. Yup. Okay I’ll call and let you know as soon as he’s out. Night babe, love you.

  • 46_and_2
    4722 days ago
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    Was surprised I started mixing up left and right after I broke my right-hand wrist while biking.

    Turns out I subconsciously associated “right” for the direction my stronger hand was on, and once my left hand started feeling like the more dominant one during recovery - my brain would automatically choose that “right” should be on my left-hand side instead, until I actively thought about which direction is which.

    This gradually decreased out as my right hand recovered and got back to being the dominant one over the next few years, but was eye-opening what shortcuts my brain uses for such basic things.

    • fluxEnglish
      2221 days ago
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      Wait, are you saying you didn’t have to actively think about which is right or left before? I’ve always had to think about it, only for a second, but it’s definitely an active thought thing for me.

        • fluxEnglish
          1021 days ago
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          Yeah, definitely. I didn’t know people didn’t have to think about it for a second.

          • baconsanga
            921 days ago
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            You’re not the only one, it takes me a second or two. Sometimes I make an L shape with my hands to see which way is left. Then again, sometimes I forget my age and name haha.

            • newbeni
              421 days ago
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              I always look for my ring, then I know which hand is left.

            • Hadriscus
              321 days ago
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              My wife has trouble with this as well. She’s also not very good with spatial reasoning, I wonder if those are linked

              • ngprc
                419 days ago
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                I am pretty alright with spatial reasoning but have a hard time with left and right. Especially in multitasking scenarios. When driving during complicated situations and in unknown environments for example. I always get my guide to point or have a look at the nav.

              • fine_sandy_bottom
                320 days ago
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                Do you have to herd her around the supermarket? I’m forever guiding my mrs out of the way of other shoppers. No spatial awareness bless her.

                • Hadriscus
                  120 days ago
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                  Lmao it’s not that bad. Or rather, it manifests at a larger scale : she’ll wonder how we came to face this way by taking that route, or how we’re able to see our home from some vantage point. She isn’t very agile but I wouldn’t say she’s dyspraxic either.

                  Is it ever an issue for you both ?

          • ilhamagh
            421 days ago
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            This is wild and I genuinely can’t wrap my head around it.

            So say, if you were blindfolded and run, if I give you command a la those rally drivers you will have a noticeable lag to my cue ? Like not instant ?

            • fluxEnglish
              721 days ago
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              I mean, it’s a split second, but yeah, I gotta think about it. I don’t think there would be noticeable lag, but it’s definitely a conscious thought. I just thought everyone had to have the thought go through their head, it’s not just like an instinct or anything.

            • grrgyle
              621 days ago
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              Now that you mention it, it’s odd that some people (like myself) have to think about it. Like I wouldn’t have to hardly think about what you meant if you said “up” or “down.

              Think of it like telling someone the directions like “twelve o’clock” versus “six o’clock” or “three o’clock” - you probably have to take a tic (heh) to picture it.

              • ilhamagh
                321 days ago
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                Yeah, the BBC article I posted above also mentions that.

                At first I thought it would be like if someone told me to touch my nose and I have to consider which part of my face it is, because for me my body is split in the middle the left and right feel distinctly different I can’t confuse one with the other. Fascinating.

                Are you ambidextrous by any chance?

      • 46_and_2
        117 days ago
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        I guess I just felt that “right” is my stronger hand direction, “left” is my weaker hand one. Now, after several years of recovery I feel it almost the same way as before, so my mind makes the same shortcut instead of thinking for a second about it. But if I ever feel the balance of my stronger-weaker side tipped (e.g. right hand has fallen asleep) I guess it’s thinking time again.

    • AlligatorBlizzard
      521 days ago
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      Funny enough, I stopped mixing up my left and right after I broke my arm roller blading (on another occasion I broke my arm while biking). I didn’t have a way to mentally keep track until the doctor set the arm slightly off with the bone bowing out a bit - it feels slightly different now, but visually you can’t tell.

    • darvit
      522 days ago
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      That’s really interesting. There are probably more people like you, but who will never know if nothing happens to their dominant hand.

  • starman2112
    4622 days ago
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    Considering almost every one of my ancestors for the last few hundred million years managed to have sex at least once, I’d say it’s pretty remarkable how I’ve managed to avoid it so far

    • SwingingTheLampEnglish
      421 days ago
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      Classic selection bias. I don’t recall the exact numbers, but I remember reading that the majority of men who have ever lived never reproduced. That’s unfortunately pretty normal.

      • rekabis
        721 days ago
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        Historically, before agriculture it was about two to three women having offspring for every man who did.

        During the Agricultural era (12,000 BCE to 2,000 BCE) that ratio hit a high of 9 women reproducing for every man who did so, and stayed around that for most of that time.

        From there it slowly declined back down to the current world-wide average of two women reproducing for every man who manages to do so.

    • kat_angstrom
      1422 days ago
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      Oooof, I hear that. Things are more political than ever at my work and it’s like, I just want to do my job and go home

    • RBWells
      1322 days ago
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      I can’t navigate politics at all. Have done ok working at startups though, some offices are not at all political. Where I work, we can fix other people’s processes if we think of a better way, we work with other departments, I don’t have to go through my manager to talk to your manager to get to you, can go directly to you. Can talk to the CEO, to ex- employees, nobody is protective of their work, nobody is angling for my job.

      • Xer0English
        521 days ago
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        Everyone in my office just fucking moans about everything, all the time. It’s honestly exhausting. The company is actually really good and gives a ton of perks. Just do your job and go home. Stop trying to bring everyone down with your shit.

    • Soup
      922 days ago
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      The rules are “make anyone above you feel good about themselves because they’ll throw a hissy fit if you don’t make them feel special. It’s pathetic and I’m tired of it.

      • intensely_human
        522 days ago
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        But like if I try this, if I break down and try this, I’m so bad at it that it’s insulting and threatening to them to see my transparent flattery and wheedling.

  • VanthEnglish
    3222 days ago
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    deleted by creator

  • SGGEnglish
    3222 days ago
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    Process sugar (diabeetus)

  • Chef_Boyardee
    2922 days ago
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    I have no sense of direction. None.

    I work in construction. If I show up to a site that is completely built, I get lost. If the floor is symmetrical in layout, I am totally screwed. It took me two full days on site once to get adjusted.

    When assigned to a new site, if there are more than a few turns in a commute, I’m using the GPS to get there for a couple of weeks.

    Also, I had no idea half of the people on this planet couldn’t whistle.

    • rekabis
      721 days ago
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      I have no sense of direction. None.

      Sounds like you are a real-life Ryoga Hibiki.

      Just curious: do you also lack the ability to visualize things in your mind? For example, I am able to bring up a road map of my city in my mind, figure out the most effective route between two points, and rotate that map in all three dimensions to “look” at it from all angles. My familiarity with the city layout and geography is the determining factor on how easily I can visualize that map. I can also do the same thing with large buildings and their internal layouts.

      My wife, on the other hand, has a somewhat similar (but nowhere near as bad) sense of direction as you, and a commensurate inability to visualize objects in her mind. So while she can mentally visualize a soccer ball as a spherical object, she cannot even visualize the hexagonal pattern of pieces, much less (on a traditional soccer ball) how some are white and others black. She doesn’t technically have aphantasia, as she is still able to visualize to a small degree, but I have always suspected her inability to visualize effectively was directly connected to her inability to navigate effectively. She also relies heavily on GPS and maps when navigating anywhere else other than the town she was born in.

      • SwingingTheLampEnglish
        521 days ago
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        For what it’s worth, I can’t visualize either, but have excellent directional sense.

        • rekabis
          321 days ago
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          So maybe it is not related, then. Or maybe only causally related, or under certain more specific visualization deficits.

          ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

      • FollyDolly
        421 days ago
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        Not OP but I can visualize great, still have no sense of direction.

      • Chef_Boyardee
        321 days ago
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        You’ll probably have your answer when I tell you that when you brought three dimensions into the map analogy, my brain kind of melted.

    • newbeni
      221 days ago
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      My husband bought me a Garmin when they very first came out, not because we were flashy people, but he wanted to know I could get somewhere by myself if I needed to . You are not alone my friend

  • RBWells
    2822 days ago
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    Whistle.

    Tell right from left without thinking about it.

    Read a map, unless it’s oriented the way I am facing. My mind will not flip it.

    • ValenThymeEnglish
      1522 days ago
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      ay you probably have right-left confusion and many people suffer from it!

      Is the worst because nobody believes you that it’s your brain they just think you’re dumb and can’t remember left from right and tell you to make an L and stuff.

      • Madlaine
        422 days ago
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        I always imagine a (local) car, and remember which side the driver sits on

        • ValenThymeEnglish
          521 days ago
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          yeah it’s weird the issue isn’t that I can’t deduce right from left. Is more that when queried the brain will immediately and confidently return the wrong answer.

          It’s like knowing the difference between a carrot and a cucumber but if someone holds one up and asks you what it is you will confidently answer incorrectly half the time.

          So you have to remember that even though you think you know the difference you actually half to take a second to make sure you have the right vegetable. Despite there being zero unsurety about it. Is madness and you sound like a loon describing it is half the problem.

          • Madlaine
            321 days ago
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            I get that. My intuition often mixes both up, too.

            That’s why I trained myself to say “driver-side” and “passenger-side” in my head when left or right come up. To a point where I don’t even have to think about thinking about it. I just visualize which side of car is meant instead of the rather abstract concept of left and right

            Might not help you; but it helps me

            • ValenThymeEnglish
              321 days ago
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              that doesn’t work because it’s a mental condition and you still get it wrong. It’s hard to explain if you don’t have it, like I said. You just sound like a fool trying to explain it.

              It also affects things like east/west in general and even two light switches that are next to each other but have different functions. It’s an actual condition and there’s a test at that link to see if your brain is affected by it.

              • Madlaine
                221 days ago
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                Well, my brain seems to be affected by it according to that test (difference score of 11) if I interpret the scale correctly

                But well, I also got autism and quite a few other mental conditions and learned all my life to cope quite well with all my disabilities; that’s why I specifically outsource direction question to a visualization that make the answer more tangible for me than listening to my intuition.

                But well, what works for some doesn’t necessarily work for all. And probably my other conditions have some influence on it as well. We’re all different, after all; even if sharing a few traits.

                • ValenThymeEnglish
                  321 days ago
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                  yeah I have tried driver/passenger in the past and still got it wrong so i just point and tell people to ignore whatever i say and follow my finger when driving which is the only time it’s usually critical. also my partner knows if I say ‘real left’ that i have double or triple checked myself. like you say you learn to cope!

                  it sucked in the past when I didn’t know about it and people would ask me for directions and then later realize i flipped something on them

        • mexicancartelEnglish
          221 days ago
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          They sit on different sides in different countries though You are lost on another country

          • Madlaine
            221 days ago
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            That’s why I explicitly stated local.*

            I don’t care which country I’m in and how they are driving there. I obviously visualize cars I grew up with.

            E: well, I see how local can be interpreted as exactly the opposite of what I mean oops

      • SwearingRobin
        322 days ago
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        Me and my dad are the same, on the left and right problem, never knew anyone else that had that problem, or that it had a name! I thought we were just weirdos :p

      • iegod
        220 days ago
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        I believe it’s your brain but that’s not mutually exclusive from dumb.

  • smackjack
    2522 days ago
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    I’ve never been able to ride a bike without at least one hand on the handlebars.

    • linux2647
      922 days ago
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      I remember a teacher talking about the physics of how a bike stays up while riding it with no hands. I thought he was joking

    • darvit
      722 days ago
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      It depends on the bicycle. I can do it on some, and not on others. I think it depends on the angle of the steering fork and also the center of balance of the handlebars.

      • evasive_chimpanzee
        621 days ago
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        It definitely depends on the bike. I had a mountain bike with big, fat, tires, and I could never ride it without hands. I also have a road bike with super skinny tires that I can ride no handed confidently enough that I can carry grocery bags in each hand while biking no handed around town.

      • Turun
        321 days ago
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        I’m not sure what to tell you, other than that yes, you can simply take your hands off the handle bars on most bikes if you’re going fast enough.

  • Binette
    2322 days ago
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    Associates faces with names easily.

    Like I’ll remember who you are, but I won’t remember your name. Got me into trouble a few times

    Edit: also forgot, but this includes associating the names of places. Combined with the fact that I can’trememberr paths and situate places I see IRL on a map, I get lost often.

    • philpo
      1522 days ago
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      That’s actually a cognitive disorder called Prosopagnosia.

      And welcome to the club - I had a stroke and while luckily all major deficits returned to normal with timely treatment, I developed prosopagnosia.

      It’s fairly freaky at times. While it’s not my main job anymore I still work as a paramedic occasionally - and when I get a massive trauma at three o’clock in the morning I can hand it over in the ED to the full resus team with every detail without looking into my notes once. But if they ask me for a name I need an ID card or my notes.

      • chicken
        522 days ago
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        Thanks, I’ve never been diagnosed or anything but it’s something I’ve had trouble with all my life, kind of just learned to be very wary about various social situations because I’d get it wrong a lot.

  • klemptor
    2122 days ago
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    Tell a joke or story in a linear fashion. I’m always fucking up, or realizing halfway through that I’ve left out an important detail. It’s how my mind works but I’m sure it’s frustrating to others. Plus I just get flop sweat sometimes.

    • KhruxEnglish
      1022 days ago
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      I just always give too much context to my stories, and quickly realise that I’m giving context for context for context and cant remember my point.

      My closest friend is very similar here though, and we can have great long conversations that are 20 layers deep of tangents and forgetting our original points. We also sometimes yell ‘pin’ at eachother as a shorthand for ‘lets put a pin in this’ which basically means that at some point we’re trying to remember what we wanted to say at that point because it was fun.

    • Fizz
      722 days ago
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      i have the opposite issue, i start telling a story trying to make it interesting and engaging and then feel like im running out of time before people disengage so i rush through and sum up 75% of the story in a few sentances and say “so yeah thats pretty much it”.

    • norimee
      421 days ago
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      I can only tell jokes I don’t find funny myself. Normally I can’t controll my laughing after the first couple of words.

    • 0ops
      321 days ago
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      I wish so bad I was better at telling stories. Not that I have many, but still

  • over_clox
    1822 days ago
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    I can’t whistle. Honestly I think it’s because one of my lower front teeth is crooked, twisted at an angle. 🤷‍♂️

    • KingJalopy
      2722 days ago
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      My parents used to tell me as a kid that I couldn’t whistle because I wasn’t eating my pizza crust. After I started eating the crust I learned how to whistle.

      Have you tried eating crust?

    • spittingimage
      622 days ago
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      Me neither, and for the same reason.

      I lost my ability to whistle in a tragic playground accident when my front teeth met the skull of a friend travelling in the other direction. Ever since, crooked front tooth.

  • Remy RoseEnglish
    1721 days ago
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    Remember how many days are in each month. I mean, I guess maybe I could if I tried harder, but I refuse.

    EDIT: ok I’m seeing everyone’s tips here, and thank you, but I gotta say None of these heuristics seem any amount easier to remember. 😭

    • lazylion_ca
      1821 days ago
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      Whats the point? When do I need this information?

      Bring on the 13x28 calender and end the madness.

      • Remy RoseEnglish
        320 days ago
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        YES THANK YOU!!! The only sane person right here! 😭😭😭

    • Turun
      921 days ago
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      Make both hands into a fist and hold them out in front of you so that the knuckles are visible. Now start on a pinky and count the knuckles and valleys between them. Knuckles are 31 days, valleys are 30 (and February). When you switch between hands it doesn’t count as a valley.

      Left Pinky knucke: January, 31 days
      Left Pinky/ring finger valley: February
      Left Ring finger knuckle: march, 31
      Left Ring/middle: April, 30
      Left Middle: may, 31
      Left Middle/index: June, 30
      Left Index: July, 31
      Right Index: August, 31
      Right Index/middle: September, 30
      Right middle: Oktober, 31
      Right middle/ring: November, 30
      Right ring finger knuckle: December, 31

      • ɘlddoW .ᴙMEnglish
        420 days ago
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        I got halfway through that, then died of old age during a month that may or may not have 31 days.

    • Reddfugee42
      721 days ago
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      30 days hath September, April June, and November.

      All the rest have 31 except for oddball February.

      • LifeOfChance
        521 days ago
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        I genuinely can’t comprehend this statement. I’ve always heard it and it just sounds like random words jumbled together

        Knuckles seem easier

        • Reddfugee42
          020 days ago
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          Hath is old English for have. Those 4 months have 30 days. Once you know that February has 28, you know the rest by process of elimination.

      • Hadriscus
        221 days ago
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        This seems as easy to memorize as any one Shakespeare play

    • Elise
      321 days ago
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      31 29 31 30 31 30 31 31 30 31 30 31

      It alternates between 31 and 30. The exception being that February got shortchanged and had to give a day to August, and it keeps alternating after that.

      Due to leap year magic February has to give up yet another day, so it’s either 28 or 29.

    • GlendatheGayWitch
      321 days ago
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      Use your knuckles and the space between from left to right. The higher points are longer months.

      The left pinky knuckle is January, the space between pinky and ring knuckle is February, the ring knuckle is March and so on. The left index knuckle will be July and you continue with August being the right hand index knuckle. All the months that land on a knuckle are 31, while everything else is 30 (except 28 or 29 for February).

  • idiomaddict
    1722 days ago
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    I used to be unable to jump, but then I did Morris dancing. I learned how to jump normally at 27.